Bit ah jist left it, ken, nae hassle tae the c*nt.

Source: https://www.fark.com/comments/12860086?utm_source=feed&utm_medium=comments&utm_campaign=fark

Classy, and nae in the least bit smug!

Source: https://www.pressandjournal.co.uk/fp/opinion/columnists/5569201/woolly-mammoth-meatballs-flying-pigs-comedy-opinion/

I da ken if I seen the last Blue Supermoon masel, but that’s nae surprising as I canna mind fit I hid for my breakfast.

Source: https://www.pressandjournal.co.uk/fp/opinion/columnists/6108358/blue-supermoon-flying-pigs-comedy-opinion/

The Christmas tree is nae so much taen doon as taen oot – it’s still smouldering in the backie, efter my Jayden used a match and a thing o’ hairspray tae defoliate it.

Source: https://www.pressandjournal.co.uk/fp/opinion/columnists/5243929/rishi-sunak-maths-18-flying-pigs-comedy-opinion/